


Of Men (Aliens, Pidge, Flying Lions, ETC) And Puns

by AgeofCipher



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: A break from things that require talent, All the puns, Bad Puns, Dark, Elentori, Humor, Inspired By Elentori, Inspired By Tumblr, Inspired by Art, Lance Is Awful, Lance Is Shitpost, M/M, Memes, Puns & Word Play, Rivals to Lovers, Romance Comes Later, Slow Romance, This Is Shitpost, Tumblr Memes, Writing Talent I mean, i wanted to add more tags
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-09-04
Updated: 2016-09-11
Packaged: 2018-08-12 22:11:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 899
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7951063
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AgeofCipher/pseuds/AgeofCipher
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Being stuck in space with 4 other people and 2 Alteans isn't that great in Keith's opinion, much less Lance's tendencies to bring up puns and be purely annoying at all the wrong times. Though, it would be nice if Lance would just stop socializing in general, but of course Keith always draws the short end of the stick.</p><p>In short, one shots of Lance being pure shit-post and bringing out the puns, Keith being annoyed, all in a related time line that was based on Elentori's streams and stream chat.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. “So Keith, on the Voltron note, we’re all right, yes?”

Keith saw it, he saw the look in Lance’s eyes and he immediately felt like something bad was going to happen. A shit-eating grin appeared on Lance’s face and Keith’s stomach dropped.

 

Lance leaned closer to Keith, leaning across the table and supporting his chin by his hand, staring up at Keith, a movement that didn’t go unnoticed by the team. “So Keith, on the Voltron note, we’re all right, yes?” Lance spoke lowly, though his voice was loud enough for everyone else at the table to hear him.

 

Silence settled over the room, Hunk and Allura staring in shock at Lance, Pidge’s face twisted into their own shit-eating grin, Coran looking for an exit from the room and Shiro glaring while Keith developed a horrified look.

 

Pidge’s laughter rang out in tune with Lance’s, and words otherwise unprovoked from Hunk’s lips dropped, “Lance I swear to god.”   
  


Allura stifled a laugh, and Coran quickly spat out an excuse to leave, and Shiro’s sigh was that of a teacher who’s heard too many penis jokes. “Lance, I’ll talk to you after we finish eating.” Shiro said, defeated.

Lance shrunk back to where he was originally sitting, his smile dimmed a bit at Keith choosing to ignore Lance’s  _ terrible  _ comment and deciding to continue eating without a reaction.

  
_ Well, I guess I failed,  _ Lance thought sourly.


	2. "Leg Day!"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Allura sets herself up for a bromance of Lance and Hunk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This hasn't been beta'd so please let me know if there is something wrong!

The paladins finally had a day off, a day they hoped to be for themselves, for resting and relaxing. Fighting the Galra near daily had taken it's toll, and creating alliances with the Resistance took time and energy, leading the paladins to take place in elaborate rituals.

Of course, Allura found many flaws within her paladins, flaws that could be honed into talents, and mainly she just wanted to get her paladins into shape for hand to hand combat, and with a day to spare she saw nothing wrong with some training.

 

As to be expected, several groans came from four of the paladins, Lance hitting his head on the table, Pidge throwing their head back, Hunk looking a bit desperate and Keith overall dreading the Altean team building exercises. Shiro, however, took the news well, as was expected of him. "Team, I think this is a good idea and  _all_ of us will participate."

The paladins had been paired up, Keith with Pidge, Lance with Hunk, and Shiro with Allura. Allura conversed with Coran for a minute before deciding on what she wanted the paladins to work on.

 

Starting with Keith and Pidge, Allura told them of her expectations. "Keith, Pidge, you will work on solo combat, close range and long range fighting. I expect that you both will learn something from the simulations that Coran has had Pidge create." With a nod, Allura turned to Lance and Hunk.

Lance was on Hunk's back, elbows on both shoulders and Lance's chin resting on top of Hunk's head. "Hunk, Lance, I want you both to work on being fit, cardio work and stamina building. Do you understand?" Lance nodded, hiding his mouth behind his hand until Allura rejoined Shiro and Coran set up the simulator for Keith and Pidge.

 

Lance jumped off of Hunk and landed next to the larger paladin, grinning as they walked to the equipment training room. "Hey Hunk?" Lance asked casually once he got to the treadmills, looking calm even though Hunk looked desperate.

"Yeah?"

"Are you hyped for Leg Day?" Lance asked, powering on the machine at the lowest setting before reaching over and doing the same for Hunk.

"Leg day?" Hunk looked genuinely confused, and Lance's shit-eating grin made it's grand appearance.

"You know, today's our day! We get to hang out and train together, on treadmills, us legs of Voltron," Lance dimmed a bit as Hunk looked more and more lost, but the ln it clicked for the yellow paladin.

"Oh! Yeah bro, sounds fun."

 

 

* * *

 

Hours had passed and the rest of Voltron had finished it up, but when they arrived to tell Hunk and Lance that training was over, everyone was surprised to find Lance and Hunk still on the treadmills, Lance offering Hunk moral support whenever he wanted to quit. "Lance, my legs hurt!" Hunk huffed, slowing down a bit.

"I know buddy, I know. You can do it though! Without you we aren't Leg Day! We're almost there Hunk!" Lance flashed an award winning smile to Hunk and within minutes they finished their workout, Hunk looking exhausted and Lance looked exhausted too, though still energetic as ever.

"Oh, hey guys! How long have you been here?" Lance asked, cracking his neck and stretching his arms, completely missing the way Keith's eyes flickered to where his shirt had risen up to show a small patch of tan skin as Hunk left the room, mumbling something about getting food.

"Lance, what is 'leg day'?" Allura asked, her face twisted in misunderstanding and Lance shrugged before slipping by her, brushing against Keith.

"Oh not much, just the name of my bromance with Hunk." With that final statement, Lance jogged out of the room, unaware of the mass confusion he left in his wake.

Shiro, was blankly staring at the door, Keith's mind was blown, Pidge gave a knowing shake of her head and Allura was baffled, hand hesitating in the air.

Leg Day had been successful with motivation, but it had not been well received by Voltron.


End file.
